The health benefits of being single

Why being single is good for your health

Single life is underrated. When you’re single you can dance like a crazy thing, flirt with your cute colleague and if your friends ask you to go to LA, then (money aside) why not? Not only can the single life be far more fun, it also has some major health perks. So, if you’re feeling glum about not finding The One, cheer yourself up by checking out these health benefits.

Health benefit of being single 1: Healthier finances

Although marriage can lower costs and create financial opportunities, the event itself costs a huge amount. The average wedding costs £18,500 in the UK – flowers, food and favors certainly add up. However, not only is getting married costly, ending the union is a rather expensive process too. The average cost of ending a marriage through the British courts is about £13,000 per divorce; whilst in the USA the average cost of a divorce is estimated to be around $20,000. And how does this affect your health? The wealthy enjoy significantly better health whilst they are alive, and they live longer than those in low socio-economic groups.

Health benefit of being single 2: Singletons keep fitter

It seems that when you get married, you not only gain a spouse, you also gain a considerable amount of weight. A poll commissioned by the Department of Health found that only 27 percent of adults met the recommended 150 minutes of physical activity each week. Of those 27 per cent, the majority were married. So how much weight does a pair in couple-kingdom gain? According to US researchers it depends on your gender. 46 per cent of the 5,000 ladies who took part in the US study gained at least 20 pounds. However, for the guys the increased weight risk was not as high. Unlike women, men gained the most weight during divorce.

Health benefit of being single 3: More friends

Ditching your buddies for cheeky nights in and romantic dates out is a classic symptom of a serious relationship. However, friendship is a hugely undervalued resource. A 10 year Australian study found that older people with a large amount of friends were 22 per cent less likely to die during the study than those older people with fewer friends. Also Harvard researchers suggested that strong social ties may promote brain health as we age and another study found that those with high social relationships were 50 per cent more likely to survive during the period of study.  So it turns out friends are not just there for secret sharing and karaoke fun.

Health benefit of being single 4: Less fights

It’s pretty obvious that screaming until you’re hoarse and yelling at your partner is no fun. However, research has shown that there may be more sinister health risks associated with fighting with your loved one. One recent study concluded that a stressful marriage can be as bad for the heart as smoking. Other research suggests that a stressful marriage can also be worse for women than men. Women who didn’t speak their minds during a fight were found to be four times more likely to die in the 10-year study period than those women who always told their partners their thoughts.

Health benefit of being single 5: Smaller portions

The fairytale goes… girl meets boy, they fall in love, marry and live happily ever after. What the fairytale doesn’t tell us is that when you meet that someone special you will find yourself feasting on man-sized portions and calorific meals. Women typically gain weight when they begin a relationship because they eat man-sized portions; but men tend to burn calories faster than women. Similarly men gain weight because couples order in more takeaways and eat out too. Considering that the average Indian takeaway contains 1,338 calories and a similar sized Chinese takeaway contains 1,436 calories it is not surprising that couples pile on the pounds.

Health benefit of being single 6: Healing powers

We don’t mean to imply that if you’re single then you can cure broken limbs and nasty cuts with a wink of your eye and a sprinkle of magic dust. However, if you are in a bad relationship with high levels of hostility then your body will take longer to heal injuries. Research was conducted in America to measure how a bad relationship affects people’s immune system.  The researchers blistered participants’ arms to measure how quickly the wounds healed. They found that the blisters on the couples who had a lot of marital stress took a full two days longer to heal than those of couples who had less hostility.

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5 qualities that men look for in women

The ladies’ guide to impressing modern men

Oh, how relationships have changed since the romance of Mr Darcy and Elizabeth Bennet. Here are the most popular qualities that modern men look for in women:

Female quality 1: She has a life of her own

It’s important to show that you’re self-sufficient when you’re trying to impress a man, and it’s equally as important to maintain this when you’re in a relationship. The average modern man doesn’t want a lady to be clinging onto him all the time – it makes him feel suffocated. Rather than ditching your friends and family to spend time with a new love interest, make sure you keep separate plans in your diary at all times.

Female quality 2: She is honest and loyal

Be honest with your love interest. If you tell them that a) you’re married and going through a particularly difficult divorce; b) you have a strange obsession with feet; or c) anything else that could potentially make them run for the hills, then you’ve done the right thing. Okay, maybe hold back on option b for now, but you see what we’re getting at. Anything that they may find out further down the line and could put them off should be made clear from the outset, or you risk wasting the time of you both.

Female quality 3: She looks after herself

This is one thing that hasn’t changed since the days of our most distant ancestors; men like a woman who takes a pride in her appearance and vice versa. We’re not talking about being a tall, slim supermodel – it’s not all about looks – but a little primping and preening here and there goes a long way. Wear something that accentuates your fantastic figure. Wear makeup to highlight your natural features; style your hair to compliment your face; and spritz on your favourite scent to boost your confidence – hello gorgeous!

Female quality 4: She is self-confident

Nowadays, being needy attracts little more than a few raised eyebrows. Despite coming across as confident, rarely do the celebrities you see in the media feel as bold and confident as they look. It’s all about faking it. Instead of zoning in on your weaknesses, develop and maximise your strengths to put you in the right frame of mind. Make sure you use your body language to your advantage, as this can help you to fake confidence when really you might prefer it if the ground were to swallow you up. Stand tall, make eye contact, and smile, for an instantly more confident you.

Female quality 5: She is mature and well-spoken

Baby talk can be cute but don’t use it too often, sugar bunny. Your average modern man likes his woman to be able to hold down an intellectual conversation as well as having a good sense of humour, and cutie-overload could put him off. Talk about interesting topics and be sure to listen to him as well as inputting your own thoughts and ideas into the conversation. Hold back on slang words for your first few dates and avoid swear words too, as they come across as uncouth.

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5 signs your relationship is over

How to spot a dead-end relationship

Do you feel like you're stuck in a relationship rut but aren't sure whether things will ever change? It's normal for relationships to hit the odd rocky patch, but if you experience three or more of the signs below and 'the chat' hasn't resolved anything, it's often a sign that the fat lady has sung and Elvis has well and truly left the building. In other words, it's over.

Signs it could be over 1: Incompatible goals for the future

They say that opposites attract, but when you want children and your other half panics at the mere mention of parenthood, or your partner wants to immigrate to another country and you want to stay put, this kind of opposition can cause a problem. Whilst it's possible to work through such mis-matched goals and reach a fair agreement that both parties are happy with, sometimes it's hard to do that without thwarting your – or your partner's – dreams. Perhaps the most unhealthy thing you could do to your relationship at this point is try to persuade one another to sacrifice future plans in order for you to stay together. Not only is this selfish, but more often than not it leads to feelings of resentment between you and your other half, which often results in a break-up anyway. If there's no compromise and you feel as though your plans for the future are being jeopardised, it's probably best to part ways for the sake of your freedom and happiness.

Signs it could be over 2: Sneaking around

The key to a great relationship is honesty and trust, so if your partner is sneaking around then it defeats the object of being in an intimate relationship and you need to tackle the problem head on. Go about it carefully though; following him/her into town to 'catch them in the act' only to find that they were purchasing your surprise birthday present could lead to all sorts of complications, and you don't want to risk being the embarrassed guilty party. Instead, it's a good idea to communicate with a secretive partner to make it clear that you've noticed they're up to something and you're offended that they couldn't talk to you about it. If you still feel like your other half is up to something, it might be a good idea to call it a day on your relationship as the trust barrier has clearly been broken.

Signs it could be over 3: No special gestures

After weeks or months of being wooed by your other half in the early stages of a relationship, when the dust begins to settle it can feel as though Cupid has disappeared off the face of the earth and suddenly you're stuck in a relationship rut. We're not expecting to be swept off our feet and taken away to an exotic island to be showered in expensive gifts, but many couples often lose sight of the small romantic gestures that make the relationship feel that bit more special. If special gestures are sparse in your romance, this by no means suggests that it's over; you may just need to make a little more effort to be romantic – suggest more things to do together and the problem should be resolved in no time. However, if after a conversation you realise that all romantic gestures have stopped because you no longer feel as strongly for your partner as you once did, this is a sign that your relationship should come to an end.

Signs it could be over 4: You can't seem to leave the past in the past

Relationships where the past can't seem to be left where it belongs are often a recipe for disaster. If you're having an argument, respond appropriately to what is happening here and now, not what happened six weeks ago. Granted – past issues can cause an underlying problem in the relationship if they are never spoken about, but once a problem has been addressed it's time to move on from it. It's a common deal-breaker in relationships to keep bringing up past issues during an argument to use as ammunition against your other half. If you can't learn to forgive and forget – or your partner can't learn to forgive and forget a mistake that you have made – then it might be time to cut all ties and start afresh.

Signs it could be over 5: You're constantly bickering

Arguing is a natural way to get things off your chest and emphasise what's upsetting or annoying you to improve your relationship in the long-run, but when things have soured to the point that you spend more of your time arguing than not, it's often time to raise the red flag. Healthy relationships are about having good conversations and being happy when you're around your other half, not constantly being surrounded by negativity and feeling angry or upset. Don't be tempted to stick together when all you do is fight; as easy as this is to do, you will end up feeling even more miserable in the long run.

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